Love and Marriage

Western societies do not condone men marrying more than one woman at a time. Serial marriages are just fine; one at a time, thank you very much. Plural marriages are simply seen as rather unseemly. Fairly unworkable too, one might imagine. Although in times long past the phenomenon of polygamy was fairly common, it might have made a lot more sense, then. A man of wealth could afford to support more than one wife and the children that resulted from a bevy of wives.

Concubinage too was in vogue then, and harems, as well. For the man of means, that is. Fair to women? Likely the temper of the times encouraged women to consider themselves fortunate that an aristocrat, a rich man, took them under his patronage, fed and clothed them, gave them what was no doubt then considered to be luxurious appointments and apartments. Not that that very thing doesn't happen in modern society.

Muslims are permitted to have more than one wife, although that temptation is tempered by the admonition that they may do so only if they have the material wealth to ensure the well-being of those dependents. One can only wonder what women may feel, how they adapt, whether the little green worm of jealousy intrudes within these relationships, whether they're resentful, bored and unhappy.

It is distinctly unlawful in most societies of the West for men to marry more than one wife; it's called bigamy and one who so indulges is prosecutable by laws set in place to ensure these social disgraces don't occur. Although they do erupt from time to time, and scandal sets in just as the law asserts itself to fine and imprison those who have the audacity to tolerate the wrath of a wife betrayed.

On the other hand, while the practise of polygamy seems distasteful to most people other than practising fundamental Muslims, it would appear, on the evidence available through the religious community near Creston, British Columbia, in the province's deep interior, that many women who have been married to a single man appear to be comfortable with their situation.

All is obviously not sweetness and light, however. In these ultra-'religious' communities it is generally older men who have the opportunity to select multiple wives, many of them very young women, occasionally mere girls, from the community. While the young men of the communities are encouraged, strenuously, to leave the commune, and their homes, lest their presence tempt young women bespoken as additional wives for old men.

The presence in Canada of communities like Bountiful have always made the various levels of government uneasy, but reluctant to enforce the law. Set in remote areas, practising their ideas of religious conviction - which do appear to the cynical eye to be tailor-made for lascivious old men, eager to enjoy a bevy of young women under their control, under the guise of religious entitlement - no one has been too eager to intervene.

It's fairly well understood that within the immigrant Muslim communities in Canada's large cities there are secretive practising polygamists; Muslim men who have taken multiple wives; in many instances unable to support them, reliant on welfare to do that for them. Through subterfuge municipal agents are kept in the dark about these women's - and their children's - husbands and fathers.

Government authorities have finally taken courage in hand to arrest two of the leaders of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints from Bountiful, charging them with polygamy; Winston Blackmore, 52, and James Oler, 44. Bountiful has a population of one thousand, a branch within Canada of the American Church. Which itself has seen its share of notoriety and prosecution of its leader.

Some of the women who have left Bountiful have complained to the authorities about the physical and emotional abuse they suffered on that farming and logging compound, and spoken about the forcible marriage of young girls to older men. They claim that the children of Bountiful do not have the opportunity to be properly educated, nor encouragement to pursue higher education or professions.

It's a complex situation. Feminist academics have studied and written about the situation on the commune and come to the conclusion that the women are not exploited, but rather willing participants in that very peculiar and particular social contract. "Bountiful's women are more diverse, less unaware than you might expect", according to McGill University assistant professor of law, Angela Campbell.

"This I learned from travelling to their community to conduct interviews with the women who live there." Brainwashed, perhaps? Or just simply relaxed and comfortable with their situation in life, and that of their children? Who's to say, in fact, whether that kind of arrangement isn't less appropriate for society than serial marriages of temporary convenience.

Within normal marriages between consenting partners, relations so very often go awry, and the children are left with one parent and great insecurity, all too often mired in poverty, when the marriages are sundered. Men and women habitually abuse one another in normal marriage situations. Conventional marriages don't necessarily offer security to women and children.

It's a tough call. All things considered, though, there are good and practical reasons to recognize societal convention in traditional one-man, one-woman marriages. Men can present as predatory creatures when it comes to women and sex, and the more the merrier, all too often. The situation in Bountiful appears to be just one of those man-made creations to satisfy the egos and lust of certain men.

Do away with it.